Be that as it may, I still had plenty to be absolutely dumbfounded by this past week, and here's a quick summary:
- Andrew Luck : I thought kids that went to Stanford were supposed to be smart? Evidently there are exceptions to this. For those of you not familiar, Luck was projected to be the number one pick in the upcoming NFL Draft. From every prognosticator to draft guru across the board, they were all in agreement that Luck would be taken #1 overall. One really nice thing about being taken number 1 in the NFL Draft is that the #1 pick is guaranteed $50 million dollars no matter what happens. Rather than take the guaranteed $50 million, Luck decided to go back to school instead. Ummm Andrew? You can still go back to school and get your degree and be the #1 pick at the same time. Yeah...it's quite possible for you to do that. Ray Lewis went back and got his degree. Larry Fitzgerald is doing the same. I'm pretty sure YOU can too. Oh you called Peyton Manning and he guided your decision to go back to school? Well I would have asked Peyton if he would have come out for $50 million guaranteed. I'm pretty sure Manning's answer would have been "YES". By the way Andrew, even if you have a great season and win the Heisman/National Championship, you STILL won't have improved your draft position. You know what you also won't have? The guaranteed $50 million, because after this little Lockout Strife gets settled, there won't be NEARLY the amount of money given to draft picks like there is now. Oh and one more thing numb-nuts....your coach just left Stanford. Read below...
- Jim Harbaugh : One of the worst kept secrets in college football (besides the Cam Newton nonsense), was that after pulling off one of the greatest turnarounds in the history of college football, Jim Harbaugh wanted out of Stanford. There are any multitude of reasons to pick as to why he wanted out, but whatever reason you pick, Harbaugh quickly became the "hot" name for any program college or pro with a head coaching vacancy. Those programs included the Carolina Panthers, Miami Dolphins, San Francisco 49ers, and his Alma mater the University of Michigan. The funniest part was, Harbaugh let it be known that there was something he hates each one of his options-most significant of which was that he hates the York Family. In the end that apparently didn't matter, as Jim signed a 5 year $25 million dollar contract to be the head coach of the Niners. On the surface this looks like a good move for the Niners, but leave it to me to find reasons as to why this is stupid. First of all, unless he plans on suiting up, the Niners still don't have a quarterback. Second, you don't replace a maniac (Mike Singletary) with another maniac. Harbaugh's mad scientist and "da fire & da passion" routine might work with college kids that who won't be there longer than 4 years, but it's a different animal when you're dealing with players that are under contract for longer than you and make a ton more money. Third, $5 million a year given to a coach that hasn't coached ONE DOWN in the NFL, is a pretty ballsy move to say the least. I'll be watching this one up close, I can promise you that dear readers.
- Seattle Seahawks : Just because it was a good game doesn't make it right. I was struggling as to whether I should I address my Hose Of Hate towards the Seahawks or the NFL in general for this one? There is no way any respectable football league worth a damn would have a 7-9 team not only making the playoffs, not only winning their division, but have them beating the defending Super Bowl Champs! The NFL is responsible for this ultimately, but I actually am confident that they'll do something about this during the next labor deal - mainly getting a salary cap that allows a team to maintain any excellence it achieves and not continue to feed the Parity Monster it's created. The fact that it's Pete Carroll enjoying the fruits of this crap really pisses me off. Carroll is one of the slipperiest scumbags to ever come down the pipe. He knew damn well what was happening with his program, and got out of dodge the second he (correctly) suspected there was going be sanctions handed down at USC. Not only did he get away with it, but had the gumption to use the term "teachable moment" when it comes to Reggie Bush handing his Heisman Trophy in! How dare you sir...how dare you. How do you sleep at night Pete? Oh yeah, on top of a pile of money with many beautiful ladies. Oh yeah and I've had enough of Matt Hasselbeck's whole "YAAAAAY! THAT'S SUPER!" schtick too. I verbally urinate on the both of them.
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