"Here I Come To Save The Daaaaaay..."

Many of you young readers might not get the Mighty Mouse reference in the title. Frankly I feel like Chris "You're With Me Leather" Berman for making a reference to a TV show that aired nearly 60 years ago. Be that as it may, the deal is now done and done under the best of terms. Manny Ramirez is officially a member of the White Sox roster. No players were given up for him. No contract extension was issued. No extra money was exchanged. Just a straight waiver claim was all it took to get him, and that's really the only way it should be.

The reaction so far has been pretty mixed. David Haugh is one of many that are already tsk-tsking the White Sox for acquiring a known steroid user. I honestly can't blame people of his line of thinking for objecting to it. I would just caution them to realize that Manny is hardly the first White Sox player that was a steroid user, and he certainly won't be the last. Anyone remember who Jose Canseco played for in 2001?

I'm not going to pretend that I've reconciled any feelings of guilt about this, because I haven't. I still feel pretty conflicted about this. There are two things I keep reminding myself over and over again that help me get through this. The first thing is that The Steroid Era is bigger than Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, or Manny Ramirez. The true price we are paying from the Era itself, is that level of trust and benefit of the doubt from the fans is forever gone for any player who has success in the big leagues now. The second thing that helps is reminding myself that this is strictly an Alliance Situation. We don't like Manny, and Manny doesn't like anyone not named "Manny Ramirez", but that's OK. In order for both the White Sox (playoff baseball in 2010) and Manny (one last big contract) to get what they want, they both know and understand that they will have to work together for it to happen.

One thing I also would like people to understand is that Manny Ramirez is still a really damn good hitter. This point is clearly and concisely articulated here. I understand that there is a tremendous amount of theater with this Alliance, but for right now The Beard is just going to enjoy the ride and hope the movie has a happy ending. With that said, after seeing my Uncle Joe this past weekend, here are some "fun facts" you may not know about Manny Ramirez :

• In 1991 Manny Ramirez was take 13th in the MLB Draft by the Cleveland Indians. Do you remember who picked 12th? That would be your Chicago Cubs. You know who they picked instead of Ramirez? Doug Glanville. My oh my how that pick could have changed Cub history...
• Manny Ramirez has made nearly $205 million dollars in his career. Not bad for a 19 year old high school dropout...
• Why does Manny wear #99? According to wikipedia : Ramirez has always worn uniform number 24, but the Dodgers have retired that number in honor of Hall-of-Fame manager Walter Alston. Ramirez countered the Dodgers' suggestion of 28 by suggesting 34, but no Dodger has worn that number since Fernando Valenzuela. Ramirez finally accepted number 99, but the next day asked for 28, the Dodgers' original suggestion. However, the Dodgers' marketing department had already begun producing merchandise with number 99, so Ramirez stuck with that number.

So there you have it. One of the most unlikeliest moves the White Sox could have made is now reality. Where they go from here, will be the answer to the $3.75 million dollar question of "Which Manny will the White Sox be getting?"

Not That It Matters

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the Bears could still be good despite their AWFUL display on Saturday night. I'm not saying that at all. In many ways, I think the game against Arizona is a preview of what we're going to see quite often this year i.e. no defense, no stopping of screen passes, receivers not being where they're supposed to be, O-line not stopping anyone or blowing people off the ball, Cutler running for his life, etc. To be fair though, here's what the third game of the preseason has correlated to the regular season in the Lovie Smith era:

2004 : Lost 13-17 to the Saints at home. Finished 5-11 in the regular season

2005 : Won 24-17 against the Colts at Indy. Finished 11-5 in the regular season. One and done in playoffs.

2006 : Lost 16-23 against the Cardinals at home. Finished 13-3. Went to the Super Bowl.

2007 : Won 31-28 against the Niners at home. Finished 7-9. No Playoffs.

2008 : Lost 30-37 against the Niners at home. Finished 9-7. No Playoffs.

2009 : Won 27-17 against the Broncos at Denver. Finished 7-9. Once again, No Playoffs.

So it can be argued that by the numbers there is no direct correlation. However, one thing that should be noted....Lovie's never gone 0-4 in the preseason. Not once....

No Shit?

I hate it when I'm right. It appears that the great and powerful Stephen Strasburg is now gone almost as soon as he arrived with the news that he will require Tommy John Surgery for his torn Ulnar Collateral Ligament. Strasburg will be out for the remainder of this season and the 2011 season as well. I've read balloon-heads like Tim Kurkjian call this a "shame for baseball", but I certainly wouldn't got that far. I'm pretty sure the game will be just fine despite this injury to a pitcher on a shitty team. To that shitty team's credit though, they definitely handled him with kid gloves as he never threw more than 99 pitches in a game all season.

I did find an interesting article about The Inverted W on mlb.com. The article does give credit to White Sox Pitching Coach Don Cooper for predicting that Strasburg does things incorrectly with his mechanics, and that he will eventually suffer arm problems. I find this a bit ironic as one of Cooper's bullpen specialists Matt Thornton is now on the DL with Elbow Inflammation, but to Coop's credit he did say what he said about Strasburg. There's other pitching coaches who offer differing theories, but none of it changes the fact that Strasburg WAS guilty of the elbow rising above the shoulder blade, and is now facing the worst surgery a pitcher can go through.

Do I think Strasburg can comeback? Absolutely he can, but as Kerry Wood showed us it's very tough to come back to the same dominant level after the surgery despite being a young guy. It's going to be even tougher for Strasburg to be dominant again if he chooses not to alter his mechanics. Otherwise, he'll have the same issues creep up again that caught up with him now.

One more thing that every team should note....NEVER pick a kid that's represented by Scott Boras.

Too Much B.S. In The World...

• Now that Eldrick's divorce from Elin is finalized as of Monday, she now feels comfortable talking to the tabloid magazine of record, People in a 19 hour four part interview. Elin says she's been through "hell" but maintains that she never hit or assaulted Woods in any way shape or form, and any suggestions otherwise is "ridiculous". Uhhhhhh-huuuuuhhhh....that's why he had cuts on his lips and ran out to his car shirtless and with no shoes on at 1:30 in the morning on Thanksgiving right Elin? Because you WEREN'T hitting him? So it looks like Tiger wasn't the only one in that household that is capable of lying their asses off. Can't wait until the court document mentioned in this report becomes public...
• Speaking of professional liars, Sammy Sosa gave this revealing interview in Chicago Magazine in which he completely points the finger at everyone else but him, is STILL playing the innocent victim card, and takes ZERO ownership of his really damn obvious steroid use as well as pass on any chance to show any hint of integrity. If anything, it's worth a read just because it's one of the most objective looks at what a D-Bag Sammy is, was, and will always be. He never "Got It" and he never will. Good Riddance.
• And finally in case you missed it, our Beacon Of Truth Deadspin.com has leaked Financial Records of several MLB teams and it is certainly turning the baseball world on it's collective ear as evidenced by this Jeff Passan column in Yahoo. The lesson not only appears that we should NEVER believe MLB Owners when they cry poor, and that Jeffrey Loria and the entire Florida Marlins Ownership group are the biggest violators of public trust. Thankfully, the Miami Dade County Commissioner is now calling for the Marlins to pony up for their new stadium now. Score another one for Internet Journalism!

Deal With The Devil

The White Sox - to their credit - have continued to fight their way through the schedule. Last night's needless nail-biter was a microcosm of what has plagued this team for the better part of the past two weeks, and that would be their suddenly quite touchable bullpen. Now with the health of both Thornton and Putz in serious jeopardy, the Sox will now have to rely on the very green yet impressive rookie Chris Sale, the even greener Sergio Santos, and the closest thing to Octavio Dotel in a White Sox uniform - Scott Linebrink, until Putz and Thornton recover. I don't know about you, but I am REALLY uncomfortable with those three at the back end of our bullpen...

Which now begs this question : would picking up Manny Ramirez be worth it? Obviously there has been multiple reports that the White Sox will make a waiver claim once Ramirez is inevitably put on waivers by the Dodgers. There's some debate as to what exactly the White Sox would have to give up, but the general consensus (Incidentally I served under General Consensus in Viet Nam) is that the Sox wouldn't be giving up a player for him. Also, at 38 years old even though his power numbers are way down, Manny can still hit. So it's quite a debate.

To be perfectly honest with you, I am really conflicted about this. I've never liked Manny Ramirez nor his Me-First-Manny-Being-Manny B.S., which has caused him to have the baseball reputation of a leper. He's quit on several teams over his career, and now because he's quit on the Dodgers is the only reason the White Sox are in a position to get him in the first place. Not to mention he's a known steroid user as well.

That being said, the White Sox are in a bind. Their bullpen is on life-support, as is their season. They aren't going to be able to pick up any pitching help, so that means the White Sox are just going to have to out-slug teams the rest of the way. Manny Ramirez would definitely help with that effort.

Bottom Line : The Beard officially hopes Kenny rolls the dice (when he's not bringing some random chick that's definitely NOT his wife to comedy clubs in Schaumburg) and signs him thus completing the White Sox most Faustian acquisition since Albert Belle. Look at it this way, if it doesn't work the White Sox only have this idiot for 5 weeks, the first two of which would involve him going to his old stomping grounds in Cleveland and Boston. If it WERE to work however, and Manny helps the Sox score enough runs to get into the postseason, they look like geniuses.

Either way, it'll be a helluva show to watch.

Only The Beginning

Life's been a little more hectic than usual for The Beard, so I apologize for the delay in between posts. To quickly sum up, the White Sox are done, the Bears are really bad, Tiger Woods is a chump, and Brett Favre is still a broke ego-maniac.

Still though, my Schadenfreude is peaking at the news that Jay Mariotti has been arrested for felony, repeat FELONY assault, in which the preliminary reports state that Mariotti "Ripped Something Out Of Her Ear And Shoved Her Around".

Just in case you were wondering....yes Jay has come out against those who have faced similar charges and you can read all about them HERE. I can't tell you how wonderfully cleansing and refreshing it is to see Mariotti get what he deserves. The best part is...we haven't heard the best parts yet. Keep in mind, this is FELONY Assault, not misdemeanor. There has to be a good reason as to why they go felony on this one.

Keeping An Eye On It...

Well it took a while, but anything that takes this long has a good chance of being done correctly, right? Roger Clemens was finally indicted by a Federal Grand Jury today for 6 charges stemming from his making false statements under oath. Normally I'd be very excited about the prospect of Roger Clemens being indicted, but it's hard for me to really dive in that pool right now, since Barry Bonds hasn't done a stitch of jail time yet (Greg Anderson has done about 5 times as much as Bonds would have incidentally), and Miguel Tejada got off with a pretty tame slap on the wrist too. Still, this has some promise, and I'll certainly pay attention to what happens with the indictment.

I remember watching those entire Congressional Hearings from start to finish two and a half years ago in total shock. Shock not only for the depths of Clemens own self-denial that he had taken PED's, but the numerous members (mostly Republican Dan Burton) of Congress who BELIEVED him. Burton in particular went after McNamee really hard in his line of questioning, and flat out called him a liar while in the very next breath calling Roger Clemens a "Titan". I remember screaming at McNamee to look at Burton and say, "If you don't want to believe me Congressman, go ask Andy Pettitte if I'm telling the truth." Unfortunately, he never did.

As for Clemens, this indictment will hopefully be the final nail in his own self-imposed coffin. I've never taken so much joy watching someones own arrogance cause such self-destruction. If you're keeping score at home, since the Mitchell Report confirmed what we all suspected about Clemens being a juice-head, we've heard Clemens say (under oath mind you) "No that was my WIFE'S Human Growth Hormone", found out about his affair with Mindy McCready which could have happened when she was 15, watched him tell Mike Wallace that "hard work" was responsible for his accomplishments, and finally watched him have his name removed from Charity Golf Tournaments plus Institutions of Sports Medicine that once bore his name.

If Clemens does in fact end up in jail for this it will drip of irony because the only person really responsible for putting Roger Clemens in jail...is Roger Clemens.

A Different Answer To A Common Question

Earlier today, my cousin Joseph asked me a question regarding the 2010 White Sox. As easy as it is for me to write his question off as a question designed not to seek answers, but rather bust my balls, I chose not to dismiss it in this case because it seems to be a question on the mind of a lot of Sox fans. The question was "Do you miss Jim Thome yet?" My brother Steven and I have shared numerous discussion on what exact value Jim Thome would bring to this years White Sox team, and we're pretty much in complete agreement on the matter. After listening to talk radio, and hearing the question asked from Joseph, I decided to share my views on the open forum that is Whitey Guccionne.

My answer to the question is still a resounding "no". I do not miss Jim Thome....not in the least, and I'll give you my reasons why. Now look, before I hear Dan Bernstein over-simplify with the "Would the White Sox be a better team with Jim Thome in the lineup?" question, let me share some numbers with you. Obviously, the White Sox started playing red hot baseball on June 9. Since June 9, they have averaged 5.05 runs scored per game. To give you an idea of how good that is, the only two teams that average more runs per game than the Sox have, are the Red Sox at 5.13, and the Yankees at 5.24. So looking at those numbers, it begs the question, how badly are the Sox really missing Thome, when they've been scoring runs at a very satisfactory clip?

Here are some other numbers that should be examined. This recent tailspin began with a trip to Baltimore on August 6. They won on August 7, 4-2 and at that time, the Team ERA was 3.84. Nine games later, the team ERA has skyrocketed to 3.97, and has given up double digit runs in a game twice! The last time I checked, Jim Thome was not a pitcher. So that's begs the other question and provides my rebuttal for the over-simplifying Dan Bernstein's of the world. What would make the White Sox a better team? Jim Thome in the lineup, or the entire pitching staff returning to form? I'd like to think the latter would be much more beneficial to the White Sox.

Right on cue, baseball-reference.com's blog has a post regarding Jim Thome's remarkable season. You can see it for yourself here.

Rk OPS+ G Year Age Tm PA AB R H 2B 3B HR RBI BB SO SB BA OBP SLG OPS Pos


1 Barry Bonds 169 126 2007 42 SFG 477 340 75 94 14 0 28 66 132 54 5 .276 .480 .565 1.045 *7/D

2 Ted Williams 190 113 1960 41 BOS 390 310 56 98 15 0 29 72 75 41 1 .316 .451 .645 1.096 *7

3 Barry Bonds 156 130 2006 41 SFG 493 367 74 99 23 0 26 77 115 51 3 .270 .454 .545 .999 *7/D

4 Willie Mays 158 136 1971 40 SFG 537 417 82 113 24 5 18 61 112 123 23 .271 .425 .482 .907 *83

5 Ted Williams 179 129 1958 39 BOS 517 411 81 135 23 2 26 85 98 49 1 .328 .458 .584 1.042 *7

6 Babe Ruth 161 125 1934 39 NYY 471 365 78 105 17 4 22 84 104 63 1 .288 .448 .537 .985 *97

7 Barry Bonds 263 147 2004 39 SFG 617 373 129 135 27 3 45 101 232 41 6 .362 .609 .812 1.422 *7/D

8 Jim Thome 163 81 2010 39 MIN 253 209 31 57 14 1 17 44 42 62 0 .273 .391 .593 .985 *D

9 Hank Aaron 177 120 1973 39 ATL 465 392 84 118 12 1 40 96 68 51 1 .301 .402 .643 1.045 *79


Looking at this list, and looking at the picture of Jim Thome's rookie card above, do you get the feeling that not all is right in Denmark? I'm not saying...I'm just saying.....it's REALLY amazing that at 39 years old Thome is still producing like this............REAAAAAAAAAAAAALLY amazing...

Told Ya...

I'd like to thank the White Sox before I begin. Thank you for ending the season last night courtesy of yet another blown save at a crucial time. There's no way they can come back from that devastating a loss. No way. That's the kind of loss that just rips any semblance of a heart you had left, mainly because it came off the bat of Jim Thome, and those goddamn Minnesota Twins. I'm so tired of them! But I digest...

I wish I had better news to blather about but unfortunately the NFL All Time Picks Leader is at it again. The news broke today that Jared Allen, Ryan Longwell, and Steve Hutchinson were sent down to Hattiesburg, MS in order to lure "Captain Crocs" back to the Vikings. Seemingly within the hour, Brett was on a plane headed for Winter Park, Minnesota, where it is expected that he will announce that he is playing again this year.

Again, this shouldn't surprise anyone. Nobody with a brain believed his B.S. Text messages about retiring a couple of weeks ago. Nobody with a critical eye believed his ankle was that bad. Nobody who could count, ever believed he would walk away from $13 million. Unfortunately for us though, despite all of us knowing full well what was going to happen....Favre found a new way to make himself look even MORE Diva-ish than he ever has before.

The fact that he needed three teammates to fly down to his house, and to make a big enough production to make it look like they were on their knees begging him to comeback is so SHAMEFUL. How big of an ego do you have, when you require that big of a display to make you feel good about playing again? How much of a Me Guy are you, that you would take time out of other players training camp schedules that they could be using to get ready for a season, to instead have to waste it making it seem like they're convincing you to do something, you've already made up your mind about doing?

I've said it before, and I'll say it till the day The Beard is no longer walking the Earth, Brett Favre is a 100% PHONY ASS BASTARD! I wish I could say the Bears are going to be able to rip his head and arm off this season, but obviously that won't be the case. Looking at the schedule though, the Jets, the Packers, and the Lions with my guy Ndamukong Suh will get a chance to do precisely that, so we can finally be permanently rid of the NFL's Worst Diva of all time.

Mayday, Mayday We're Going Down...

I'm having quite the strenuous debate between my mind and my soul. Intellectually, I know there's a ton of baseball left to play, and the White Sox are far from out of it (technically). Soul wise though, I can't help but feel so deflated, after the results over the past week. The White Sox got the crap beat out of them two out of three times by the Twins AT HOME, and then threw away two games against the Tigers that they had won. Those are very tough results to take when you're in a pennant race.

I haven't delved too deep into the stats, other than noticing that the Twins are 22-8 after the All-Star Break, and the White Sox have posted a 16-15 mark since the break. Offensively, the White Sox have been OK over the past week, scoring 6 runs in a game twice, 8 runs in a game twice. Their pitching on the other hand has abandoned them both among the starters and relievers. The Sox have given up 46 runs in their last 8 games for a 5.75 clip. That's quite a departure for them. In the meantime the Twins are on fire having won 7 of their last 8 games. They've scored a modest 34 runs in 8 games, but they've given up 22 runs in 8 games for a 2.75 clip. That's also quite a departure from their normal pitching metrics, thus far.

Essentially what it comes down to is, the Twins are a hot team right now, and the White Sox have come back to reality for the time being. Thankfully, there's a day off before the two go head to head again in Target Field. So for the White Sox it's real simple : continue to score runs at the pace they have been scoring against Twins picthing, and hope that the pitching staff returns to normal - particularly among the front end of the bullpen.

As well all know is true about baseball however, there's a HUGE difference between "Simple", and "Easy".

Notes And Observations From Practice

I hate preseason games. I really do. I hate that there's so many games, and I hate that so many people don't really understand that the games are not taken seriously by the players and coaches. I hate that a lot teams have bad injuries that take place during them. I hate that people will watch the first game of the preseaon and actually attempt to draw conclusions from them! They are pretty much a waste of everyone's time, and there's a good reason as to why there are serious discussions about only having 2 preseason games per season come next labor agreement.

That said though, I DID watch the Bears vs Chargers game with some interest, and here's what I saw:

• The Offensive Line actually pass protected better than I thought they would in the first and midway through the second quarters. Chris Williams in particularly played pretty well in pass blocking. The one negative I noticed, is a pretty big one. They had ZERO successful run-blocks that I could tell among the starters. They didn't blow anyone off the ball, particularly in the middle of the line.
• Cutler played on 8 plays, and I'm very happy about that. I'm not even excited that he was 2 for 2. I'm very excited he stayed healthy despite a sack, and taking a pretty good hit when he scrambled in the first quarter.
• I believe Devin Aromashodu is a starting receiver on the Bears when the regular season begins. He didn't disappointment in the least.
• Julius Peppers was invisible. Tommie Harris wasn't invisible. Both can play better though.
• Chris Harris was late to rotate over on San Diego's TD in the first quarter. I'd like to believe that's because he's playing out of position. He's not a free safety. Hopefully Major Wright is.
• Brian Urlacher looked OK. Especially when he was taken out of the game and didn't get injured.

So onto next week, in the second of four meaningless games. I'd like to see the timing on both sides of the ball improve, but just mainly stay injury free.

Better...

Scottie Pippen took his rightful place in the NBA Hall Of Fame this weekend. He was a godsend in many ways as a player for the Bulls because of what he was able to do on the court, as well as being able to check his ego about being the focal point in deference to M.J. Pippen not only was a better than average scorer, but also excelled in the position of point-forward and was as hellacious as they come on defense. It is not a stretch to say that Pippen was as vital a component to the Bulls Dynasty of the 1990's as Jordan was, and that there wouldn't be 6 championship banners hanging in the United Center without Scottie Pippen.

As far as Pippen off the court??? Eh...Pippen was known for many years as "No Tippen Pippen" among bars and restaurants in Chicago due to his frugality. He was also no stranger to police blotter as he was investigated over the years for gun charges as well as DUI, but wasn't convicted. The most famous incident Pippen is notorious for (besides his asking out of the last shot play in 1994 Eastern Conference Semi's), was his handling of his long term contract status, and the grief he caused Jerry Krause, despite Krause cautioning Pippen to not sign the long term deal. Eventually Pippen realized over the years that Jerry Krause DID treat him fairly in that situation, and the two of them did kiss and makeup.

As far as his speech? It was far from graceful or eloquent, but compared to Jordan's Hall Of Fame speech, Pippen's was way more enjoyable, simply because Pippen showed humility and gratitude, unlike Jordan who took that opportunity to settle scores of all the people who have "Wronged Him".

So congratulations to Scottie Pippen for taking his well-deserved place among the NBA's All Time Greats! For all the ups and downs, it was a helluva run for the Bulls and us Bulls fans.

Random Baseball Question

One of my favorite blogs to visit is Cot's Baseball Contracts. One of the reasons why is because they have this section which details the biggest contracts of all time. Looking at the list below, not counting the guys on the Yankees, there are only two guys that won championships after signing for big money. So the question becomes, is it worth it to spend top dollar on free agents if you're trying to win a World Series? ;Looking at this list, I'd say it isn't worth it. You can read the entire page here.

Total Value



The most lucrative contracts in baseball history, by total value:

1. Alex Rodriguez, $275,000,000 (2008-17)
2. Alex Rodriguez, $252,000,000 (2001-10)
3. Derek Jeter, $189,000,000 (2001-10)
4. Joe Mauer, $184,000,000 (2011-18)
5. Mark Teixeira, $180,000,000 (2009-16)
6. CC Sabathia, $161,000,000 (2009-15)
7. Manny Ramirez, $160,000,000 (2001-08)
8. Miguel Cabrera, $152,300,000 (2008-15)
9. Todd Helton, $141,500,000 (2003-11)
10. Johan Santana, $137,500,000 (2008-13)
11. Alfonso Soriano, $136,000,000 (2007-14)
12. Vernon Wells, $126,000,000 (2008-14)
13. Barry Zito, $126,000,000 (2007-13)
14. Ryan Howard, $125,000,000 (2012-16)
15. Mike Hampton, $121,000,000 (2001-08)
16. Jason Giambi, $120,000,000 (2002-08)
17. Matt Holliday, $120,000,000 (2010-16)
18. Carlos Beltran, $119,000,000 (2005-11)
19. Ken Griffey Jr., $116,500,000 (2000-08)
20. Kevin Brown, $105,000,000 (1999-2005)
21. Carlos Lee, $100,000,000 (2007-12)
22. Albert Pujols, $100,000,000 (2004-10)
23. Carlos Zambrano, $91,500,000 (2008-12)
24. Mike Piazza, $91,000,000 (1999-2005)
25. Barry Bonds, $90,000,000 (2002-06)
26. Torii Hunter, $90,000,000 (2008-12)
27. Chipper Jones, $90,000,000 (2001-06)
28. Scott Rolen, $90,000,000 (2003-10)
29. Ichiro Suzuki, $90,000,000 (2008-12)

Before I Forget, Screw Jack Tatum!

I know I'm WAY late to the party on this one, but I'd be remiss if I didn't share my thoughts and feelings about the recently departed former Oakland Raider Jack Tatum,and I want the record to reflect that Whitey Guccione wasn't afraid to speak his mind about Tatum. There really hasn't been too many fluff pieces that I encountered (except this one) that tried to rewrite Tatum's history or excuse him from one of the biggest NFL Cheap Shots in the history of the game. I'm referring of course to his hit on the late Darryl Stingley in a preseason - repeat PREEEEEEESEASON - game in 1978 which left Stingley a paralyzed quadriplegic.

I suppose I should get the easy stuff out of the way. Back in the 1970's, the NFL rules were very different to the point where they were almost invisible when it came to player safety. It was a completely different game, and some of the best teams in the league didn't just hit people, but tried to injure them in the process because quiet honestly there was no fear of league punishment for doing so. As you can see from his highlight reel, there's plenty of hard hits and cheap shots from Tatum's career to choose from. Let me be clear though, whether or not Tatum's hit on Stingley was technically clean, or within the rules, or whatever kind of spin-doctoring you want to apply to it, is NOT the issue I have with Tatum.

First of all, for the record...that hit WAS a cheap shot! It's a freakin PRESEASON game people. Nobody is going that hard in the preseason in this era or Tatum's era. Not to mention the ball was already way past Stingley to the point where Darryl had no chance of catching it, but whatever, I understand that people will never get over those facts, and still continue to believe that Tatum did nothing wrong, even though I'd love to see if they say the same thing if they were the one Tatum paralyzed.

The issue I have with Tatum stems from how he conducted himself in all the years after that hit. Here's the thing that gets lost in this...Tatum DID feel bad about it. He admitted he went to the hospital after the game and waited for Stingley to regain consciousness. Is that something a person with no remorse or zero regret would do? I'd like to think that Tatum didn't go there to stand in front of the freshly paralyzed Stingley and say "sh*t happens" while grabbing his crotch or something, wouldn't you? I'm pretty sure Tatum was there to apologize based on not only his hospital visit, but also because, according to people who knew Jack, he was not only a different player after that hit, but a different person as well.

Rather than come clean afterwards and admit to the world and Darryl, "Yeah I messed up. I shouldn't have done that in a preseason game where nothing matters, I'm so sorry", Tatum decides to write a book. The Title? "They Call Me Assassin". Interesting choice considering John Madden said nobody ever called Tatum "The Assassin" when he was playing, but OK. He didn't stop there though. In Tatum's book he boasts "My hits borderline on Felonious Assault", and makes other such excuses (he actually suggested that the Quick Slant be an illegal play) which helped play up his tough guy image in order to get a maximum amount of book sales. Tatum wrote two other books after this one, which also offered no apology to Stingley, continued to try and convince everyone that he was doing his "job", and that he still has no regrets for anything.

Now there's where I have a problem with Tatum. It would be one thing if actually believed the things he wrote about himself in his autobiographies, but as I pointed out earlier, he clearly didn't feel that way. He did feel bad about what he did to Darryl, but he chose not to admit it, simply because it was more profitable for him not to.

These are not the actions of a man who has a tremendous amount of integrity, if any. These are not the actions of a man who deserves praise. These are the actions of a man who knew right from wrong, but chose to sell out his beliefs for the sake of his money-making image. Well congrats to you then Jack. I hope hell has a circle where Darryl gets to paralyze you over and over again, all the while saying it was the Quick Slant's fault.

Well That's A New One...

While watching the White Sox decide that they'd like to urinate away their chances at making the postseason by losing 3 out of 4 to the worthless and baseball incompetent Baltimore Orioles, I needed to look for something in sports to distract me that wasn't Chicago Bears related. I didn't have luck at first since the Bears released their (ahem) "depth chart" today that really is more of a rough draft since Devin Hester is listed as a starting receiver despite a groin pull and Devin Aromashadu being WAY better at the position than Hester being listed as the #3. Then my brother brought THIS gem to my attention.

It seems our old friend Brian Cushing made the news again, relating to his positive test of a banned substance. After amazingly being allowed to keep his silly award after a second vote was taken, he is now trying to double down on his luck, by trying to convince the NFL to reduce his suspension because his reason for testing positive was (drumroll) "Overtrained Athlete Syndrome"!!!!!

YES! OF COURSE IT WAS!!! Man we really all owe Brian an apology don't we? We're soooo sorry Brian!!!! How could we have missed that?! I mean obviously Ben Johnson, Floyd Landis, Mark McGwire, Jason Giambi, Andy Pettite, Roger Clemens and the others offered that lame excuse too right? Shame on us! We really should have known that it was yet another case of "OAS". "OAS" has been a silent epidemic in sports. It's obviously been responsible for at least 90% of the positive test results for performance enhancing drugs over the years. Arnold Schwarzenegger himself told people he too was a victim of "OAS" because he never took anything during his competitive bodybuilding days. Lyle Alzado also told the world that "OAS got me what I wanted but it also got me very sick." Vince McMahon of the WWE was famously on trial for distributing cases of "OAS" throughout his entire organization. And you guessed it, Barry Bonds' defense for his indictment is that he too is a victim of "OAS".

WOW...I'm stunned. I can't believe Brian thinks the league is this stupid. Apparently his owner thinks the league is this stupid too because Bob McNair actually met with Goodell today trying to convince him of this nonsense.

Here's hoping Wyatt Goodell holds up this picture to McNair and asks "Does OAS give you boobies too?"

Do You Believe Me Now?

This is bordering the ridiculous at this point. In case you missed it - and judging by the television ratings, you did - Eldrick Woods played his WORST four rounds of golf this past weekend since he joined the PGA Tour. The damages include shooting 18 over par, shooting over par on 25 of the 72 holes, and is now in danger of no longer being the top ranked golfer in the world. Now he faces the possibility of not even being picked for the Ryder Cup Team...and I couldn't be more schadenfreude about it!

The most amazing thing about this mysterious funk (to put it lightly) that Woods is going through is that the more he plays, the worse he gets. He started the season by finishing fourth at the Masters, then he posted his pedestrian 13 strokes behind the leader finish at the British Open, and now he finished in next to last place at a tournament where he's never finished worse than 5th in the last 11 times he's competed in it. Ouch.

Not only is he not winning, or being competitive, but the way he is playing is really suspicious. From striking balls fat on Par 3's, missing routine chips, slicing tee shots so bad that they're hitting trees and spectators on a routine basis it's all been a big bag of AWFUL. It's gotten so bad that Woods himself said "I wouldn’t help the team if I’m playing like this" when asked about the possibility of being on the Ryder Cup team.

There's just something really off about him right now, and again I hate to beat a dead horse, but you can't help but wonder if Doctor Galea not being able to treat him has a lot to do with this? Say Galea starts talking. Say Galea admits that he's been giving Woods steroids, HGH, and a strict regimen of Performance Enhancing Drugs over the latter part of Woods' career. Doesn't that change things? Doesn't that impact how fans will respect Woods even more than Woods cheating on his wife EVER could? Doesn't that severely diminish what Woods has accomplished, much the same way as watching A-Rod hit 600 home runs and NOBODY cares? Doesn't it explain the remarkable shot making and his winning tournaments at a record pace that we all witnessed over his career?

As William Shakespeare once said, "abso-freakin-lutely!"

CROC Out With Your Cock Out!

You knew this was coming...if you'll pardon the expression. WARNING : If you have delicate ears, or if you have little kids reading this blog, you might want to skip this post because I'm going to be working a little "blue". Love them, detest them, or both, the one shining beacon of light and truth in the world of sports reporting Deadspin.com unleashed this bombshell regarding the NFL All Time Leader in Picks Thrown, Brett Favre today.

There's a few things at work here. Obviously, this is far from the first time an athlete, specifically an NFL Player, has been caught or exposed with cellphone pictures of him and his Wang out. This has been a phenomenon of sorts for some time, and it's indirectly responsible for how deadspin even became aware of the Favre Cock Pics in the first place, according to the article. These pictures usually come to light because the initial recipient of the picture was some ex-girlfriend who got dumped by the player, and in an act of revenge she releases the picture of the athlete and his dick, out to the media. The player who is literally "exposed" usually offers some bullshit "I'm sorry I let down my fans" apology, and it's subsequently brushed over.

This situation however is NOT one of those typical Wang Out occurrences! This is Brett Fucking Favre! The same Brett Favre that tried to tell everyone how important his wife is to him, and how much it meant to him that she was with him when he went to rehab. This is the same Brett Favre that wanted credit for how he "stood by her" during his wife's battle with breast cancer - even though any decent human being would do that without even THINKING about it. The same Brett Favre that shoved his father's death down everyone's throat on a Monday Night Football game against the Oakland Raiders in 2003, and all the other personal tragedies he's had in his life. This is the same Brett Favre that the Boo-Yah's, John Madden, and all the other Favre Dick-Lickers out there, have tried to convince everyone that Brett's just a great guy who loves to play football as if it's worthy of sainthood.

Again this is all dependent upon these pictures actually existing and thus becoming public. If they do exist and are released, then it turns out that this "great guy" is nothing more than a pervy, masturbating while wearing nothing but Crocs and a sticky watch, scumbag degenerate who doesn't give a shit about his wife, his kids, or anybody else but Brett Favre. You can say what you want about A.J. Daulerio's character, bully tactics, willingness to jump the gun with the chick with the (formerly) big boobies Jenn Sterger, etc. but the fact remains that's he's exposing Brett Favre for what he has been his entire life, and that is a raging, selfish dirtball.

Nothing A.J. or Deadspin does will change that fact, and now thankfully, neither will Brett...

"WOLF! WOLF! WOLF!!!!!"

As Ray Charles once sang, "Here we go again". Unless you just got back from Mars, you may have heard that the NFL's all time leader in Interceptions thrown Brett Favre has "retired" for the third time in his career today. If you're like me, at this point your own private B.S. Detector doesn't even react anymore when one of these stories breaks involving Vicodin Boy, because we've been down this road a time or two and we all know that the movie still ends with him suited up ready to play on Week 1. I was relieved with exception to the Boo-Yah's, everyone else is pretty skeptical that this retirement is for real as well - and that includes his teammates evidently.

Now there is one thing that should probably be addressed. Could his ankle still not be healed from the surgery he had this offseason? Absolutely that's possible. He IS 40 years old after all, and the body - especially a body that's been exposed to the hits of the NFL for nearly 20 years isn't going to respond as it usually does after a certain point. Brett Favre's ankle certainly falls in that category. So I understand that people would be tempted to believe that it's not a matter of does Favre want to play, but rather will his ankle let him.

I'm not buying any of that however, and I'll tell you why. Besides the obvious factors of Favre being notoriously and conveniently indecisive especially when it brings him all the extra attention, speculation, limelight, focus, and ass-kissing that only ESPN can provide a diva like him, there's another reason I think is a dead giveaway. The reason is, that if Favre were that serious about hanging it up, wouldn't it stand to reason that either he or the Vikings would call a press conference to announce his farewell from the league? He's still under contract in case you were wondering, which means that the Vikings have to make an an official announcement as to whether or not a player under contract has indeed retired. Plus if his mind was indeed made up that this is it for him, there would have to be some sort of goodbye or sendoff for him wouldn't there? Maybe the press conference is on it's way, maybe it isn't. Maybe Favre is telling the Vikings that his ankle isn't healthy now, but if Week 3 comes around and it starts feeling fine again, maybe he calls up Childress and he's starting by Week 4 - thus preserving his consecutive games played streak?

Only Favre really knows for sure, but mark it down right here : Favre is coming back THIS season. I refuse to believe he isn't until the final snap of Week 17 takes place and he hasn't seen the field yet. Even if that happens though....I still can't rule out that he makes a comeback again in 2011

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Trade Deadline Breakdown

Another No Waiver Trade Deadline has come and gone. Here's my take on both Chicago teams and the rest of the deals other teams made. Before I do, I feel a compulsory need to ask, does anyone give a sh*t that the Chicago Bears are in training camp right now? Just checking...

White Sox : After much fan-fair, hype, name calling, and hypothetical "what ifs", the White Sox made an efficient, but certainly not sexy trade of pitchers Daniel Hudson & David Holmberg (who was born in 1991 for gods sake! I'm very old) for starting pitcher Edwin Jackson - essentially exchanging one young 2 pitch pitcher, for a veteran 2 pitch pitcher. Nobody really understands how it's possible for Jackson to go to the National League and be BAD, but the White Sox and Don Cooper think they know what's wrong with Jackson this year and will correct it.

This was far from the splashy and obvious move the Sox had been trying to make happen for the past 2 months of landing Adam Dunn. Obviously Dunn didn't end up on the White Sox, or anywhere else. There were also some shockingly random discussions about Manny Ramirez being moved to the White Sox, but I was glad to learn that Kenny Williams wasn't too serious about that, and pretty much demanded that the Dodgers just trade him to the Sox and pay most of Manny's salary. That's exactly what I would offer for Manny too! Ned Colletti told Kenny "thanks but no thanks".

In any case, I think this is a good move for the White Sox. Aside from only tacking on $8.7 million to the books next year, this move wasn't so much about Daniel Hudson, but rather had more to do with Freddy Garcia. Jake Peavy's injury really created a big hole in the rotation, not for the fifth spot, but rather the fourth spot. On a team with a realistic shot at the playoffs, Freddy Garcia should be a fifth starter on that team. Hudson more than likely would have been OK as the fifth starter, but "Freddy Junkball" should be in a position where he provides nothing but gravy with what he does on the mound, which is why the 5th spot in the rotation is where he belongs and he has appropriately thrived in that fifth spot all season. Jackson's acquisition now gives the Sox enough pitching depth where Freddy goes back to #5, and by deductive logic makes the White Sox better.

Cubs : I'll give the Cubs credit, they certainly tried to do the right thing and deal Derrick Lee. They had a deal done for him to be moved to the Los Angeles Angels of Disney, but Lee figuratively told Jim Hendry, the Angels, and Cubs fans to "Stick It" by invoking his 10 & 5 No Trade Clause. In The Beard's view, Lee's refusal is pretty revealing into what a softy he really is. First of all, he's actually BUILDING A HOUSE in Southern California at the present time. Second, he wouldn't be taking any sort of paycut to become an Angel (obviously). Third, he would be going to a team that's actually in contention - or at least are in a better position to contend than the Cubs. Still, Lee said no, and by doing so he said he'd rather be comfortable with no expectations, rather than deal with pressure. Maybe he's been hanging out with LeBron too much?

Regardless, the Cubs did make a move and dealt Ted Lilly and Ryan Theriot to the Dodgers for Blake DeWitt, Brett Wallach (Tim's Son), and Kyle Smit. Essentially the get two really young pitchers for Lilly, and got a 6 years younger version of Theriot, but he has potential to get better. In terms of money, DeWitt doesn't add anything much to the already $103,525,000 the Cubs have committed to the payroll in 2011. All in all, it's kind of a nothing move, but we all know that if the Cubs organization had their druthers, they'd clean house Fire Sale style...but we all know why that's not going to happen.

The Rest : Speaking of Fire Sales, that's exactly what you have in Cleveland, Arizona, Houston and Kansas City, as the all four teams did a whole lot of dealing. The Indians started by unloading Jhonny Peralta to the Tigers, Austin Kearns plus Kerry Wood to the Yankees, and Jake Westbrook to the Cardinals in a 3 team deal. The Diamondbacks unloaded Dan Haren to the Angels, Chad Qualls to the Rays, Jackson to the White Sox, and Chris Snyder to the Pirates. The Astros traded away long time stalworts with Roy Oswalt going to the Phillies and Lane Berkman going to the Yankees. The Royals sprung Scotty Pods out of their own personal jail, and dealt Rick Ankiel and Kyle Farnsworth to the Atlanta Braves.

Obviously everyone is looking at what the Yankees did, since they seem to be the team that acquired most of the big name castoffs, especially with "Fat Elvis" Lance Berkman. He seems to be the guy the Yankees envisioned Nick Johnson being this past offseason. I'm not really sure how much Kerry Wood is going to help their bullpen with his 6.80 ERA, and 1.600 WHIP this season?

The one team though that I think very quietly ended up putting themselves in a great position is the San Diego Padres. They took a shot at aging Miguel Tejada and traded practically nothing to get him with the understanding that being back in the National League might bring his numbers up. The move that really makes me say "Wow" however, is their involvement in the 3 team trade to acquire Ryan Ludwick. If Ludwick continues to do what he's been doing, Tejada bounces back to his Houston form of last year, and Adrian Gonzalez is Adrian Gonzalez, that should be more than enough to ward off the San Francisco Giants for the NL West Title, especially when the Padre pitching staff gives up the fewest Runs Per Game in the National League, is number 1 in Team ERA, and has the Lowest Team WHIP  in the NL.