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Sunday, October 2, 2011

Yeah But You Still Suck...

I honestly didn't think it was possible for a Bears win to make me feel bad, but here we are. Today's game against the Carolina Panthers and their #1 draft pick rookie sensation Cam Newton was to serve as a measuring stick for how good the Bears are. Unfortunately for us, the results were not good for the Bears long term prognosis.

Regardless of the score, this Chicago Bears victory is hardly what I would term "resounding". As a matter of fact, the Bears were pretty fortunate to escape with the "W" when you consider that the Panthers - who are in a rebuilding mode mind you - absolutely decimated the Bears vaunted defense both through the air and on the ground. Were it not for a few lucky breaks from the officials (see Jeremy Shockey's non-pushoff "push off"), and some fortuitous turnovers amid some stupid-ass flips/back flips, this game could have easily dropped the Bears to 1-3. Let's get to the particulars:

Offense : After weeks of hearing how the Bears need to run the ball more, Offensive Coordinator Mike Martz went Full Retard and called a grand total of 31 rushes, including 9 straight to open the game, paving the way for Matt Forte to rush for 205 yards on the day. Forte's 205 yards tied him for #2 in franchise history for yards in a game.

Martz called plays in a manner that seemingly was meant as a direct middle finger to all the arm-chair play callers that have been pissing and moaning for three weeks about "balance". The problem is, it completely backfired as now the meatballs get to say "See I told you so". Never mind that while the offensive line is getting a lot of credit, people who actually watched the game know that Forte made a lot of those plays happen all by himself. There were plenty of times where lineman missed their block (completely whiffing in many cases), and only the sheer athleticism of Forte made something out of nothing.

In the end it meant 17 pass attempts for Jay Cutler amounting to 102 yards. Jay might as well have been neutered right on the 50 yard line once the final gun sounded. Congratulations Bear fans/Jerry Angelo. Through your constant idiotic consternation and lack of obtaining good offensive lineman, you have turned a 4,000 yard Pro Bowl passing quarterback into Mike Tomczak. I hope you're proud of yourselves because all you've done is show that you haven't accepted the fact that the only way to win championships in the NFL is to throw the football. Want proof? See Tom Brady, Aaron Rodgers, Ben Roethlisberger, Eli Manning, Peyton Manning, do I need to go on?

Defense : The beast known as "Lovie Marinelli" shouldn't be sleeping well tonight. In case you were wondering, the Bears defense gave up 543 total yards today. The Bears haven't given up that many yards in a game since 1982! Think about how many AWFUL Bears defenses have taken field since then. I'm talking about the Wannie and Jauron years specifically, where many a team went through the Bears defense like they were a high school team, yet NONE of them touched what the Panthers did today.

It wasn't exactly a one dimensional approach the Panthers took either. Despite Steve Smith doing his best "2005 version of Steve Smith" imitation en route to 8 catches for 181 yards, the Panthers also got 169 yards on the ground as well. In case you were wondering, the Bears didn't feel the need to sack Cam Newton either, as anytime the Bears generated any pass rush, Newton stepped up in the pocket and drilled a (WIDE) open receiver.

This unit should be embarrassed. There is no excuse for this type of performance.

Special Teams : Bail Outs are fun, and the Special Teams unit gave the rest of the team a BIG one today. Devin Hester broke off a 69 yard punt return for a TD, while Julius Peppers blocked a field goal in the third quarter. Punter Adam Podlesh gave the Bears good field position, and Robbie Gould was his usual efficient self. Make no mistake about it, Special Teams gets the Game Ball for this one.

Where Do We Go From Here : To Detroit, where I fully expect the Lions to practically castrate the Bears. Aside from the fact that I believe the Lions are for real this year, I just don't expect the Bears to come up with a realistic game plan offensively to attack the weak spots (read : secondary) of the Detroit Defense. Concurrently, I don't expect the Bears defense to be able to stop the Lions offense - specifically Calvin Johnson - with a non-existent pass rush and a depleted safety corps.

In a world where the most dynamic, innovative, and talent-laden teams throw the ball to win, the Bears are running it 63% of the time...

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